Online Dating: Icebreaker Tips

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Imagine this scenario: you click on a promising online profile and read through his or her bio. In your head, the boxes check and you hover over the ‘Chat’ button in hopes to find out more about this dream person but then you freeze – what exactly do you say?

Despite what is said about hiding behind the veil of anonymity, we hardly think that this can be applied to online dating. After all, the point is to get to know each other!

As nerve-wrecking as it may seem, there’s no need to shut your browser in panic. Here are our top 3 tips to break the ice without breaking into cold sweat!

  1. Strike a conversation

When you’re filled with adrenaline and panic takes hold, you may be tempted to hastily type a “Hi, how are you?” to get it over and done with. While this is perfectly polite, it is also forgettable, bound to be lost in a sea of messages from others.

Dropping a one-liner may make the other person confused as well, as they wouldn’t know how to go on from there. By being proactive in initiating a topic, you save them the trouble of having to go through your profile to carry on the conversation.

What drew you to the profile? Was it her bio describing a weekend hobby you two have in common? Pick something about their dating profile to comment on (nicely, of course) and use that as an anchor for your opener. It’s a great way to show that you’re interested in getting to know them better and that you paid attention to what they have to show.

Tip: In your excitement, don’t forget to write in readable, properly punctuated sentences to avoid being taken wrongly. Also try to stay away from difficult words lest the other person misinterprets it. You don’t want to be misunderstood, do you?

  1. To continue the conversation, pay attention and comment

While you’re trying to find something interesting to mention, steer away from comments about their physical features until you’ve gotten a hold of the conversation. It can make you appear superficial and you run the risk of mentioning something they may be self-conscious of. The ball is in your court!

Pay attention to their comments and share your thoughts on them if there are chances to. You can also share more about yourself; don’t think that you have to create a persona just to please the other person.

One thing to be mindful of is the flow of the conversation. Are you dominating it unconsciously? It could cause him or her to lose interest because they can’t get a word in edgewise! It’s easy to lose the interest of someone online since you only have the tone and their responses to go by, and even those can be misleading. It’s all in the details!

Tip:  After sending your message, give the other person 12 hours to reply instead of thinking that all hope is lost. When you do get a response, a pitfall here would be starting fast and strong initially and then replying slowly after some time. It could be easily misconstrued as cooling interest. Explain to them, if you must, why you suddenly took a week to reply. It’s only polite!

  1.      Take it easy

When you’ve been chatting for hours it’s exciting, isn’t it? While you want to know everything about the other person, take it slow. This may sound self-explanatory, but it’s easy to lose yourself when you’re head over heels.

Bombarding them with multiple questions can overwhelm them and messages can get lost in the process. Steer the conversation if you’d like to find out something else about them. You get bonus points for being able to bring up more common interests or sharing insights on matters important to the both of you.

Tip: Wait a few days before bringing up sensitive topics. It’s best to get to a level of comfort with the other person first before delving into controversial issues. Once both of you have a better understanding of each other, it will be easier to discuss such matters without the other taking offence.

So there you have it, your personal treasure trove of tips! Now, are you ready to get to know some great people at If you want to know how to create an amazing online dating profile, click here!


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