The #AskDrLove Show: Episode 1

We sat down with Deon, Dr. Love and founder of Love Express, Divine Connect and I-MeetYou.com  and Cindy, chief dating coach of Divine Connect, for our first episode of ask Dr. Love!

Watch video now or read it below:
The #AskDrLove Show Ep.1 (Am I Dating A Materialistic Girl?)
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Here are some of the user-submitted questions that they answered.

I always find myself going after the popular girl who has many suitors. How do I make myself a worthy candidate of her?

Of course it’ll be a difficult conquest as a popular girl with many suitors will mean that you have a lot of competitors, but it isn’t necessarily impossible to win her heart! However, you need to ensure that you like her for who she is and not see her as merely a prize to be won. Show her that you understands what she needs and show her your caring side to get that fighting chance. But don’t just be a Mr. Nice Guy, as she probably already has too many of them surrounding her. Take online guides with a pinch of salt, as many of these are cookie cutter solutions that do not account for your personality and character. One way to stand out from your competitors is to undergo coaching. Personal development is the key to helping you explore your strengths and be a better and more authentic you!

How do I find out if the girl I am dating Is materialistic? What are some simple ways that can help me discover if the girl likes me or my wealth?

For starters, don’t flaunt your wealth from the start! Although you might feel inclined to lavish her, hold off that thought until you are sure she likes you for who you are rather than what you can offer her. One way to do so is to alternate between restaurants and cheaper options, like foodcourts. If the lady shows great distaste at eating at some place other than restaurants, that will be a hint towards her attitude towards wealth. We also have one trick for you: ‘forget’ to bring your wallet for one date and see whether she pays!

I am on a tight budget and do not have the capacity to spend a lot when I am out. What can I do if I still want to bring her out on a date? 

You can search avenues like social media as well as newspapers for new happenings and events around Singapore. Art exhibitions, libraries, outdoor spaces are typically free as well. Recall when you were young? The only way to a girl’s heart was through conversation. Chatting over meals, chatting while studying, chatting through the night. Remember that in dating, it is the connection that matters at the end of the day. Connect spiritually and emotionally through intimate conversations.

“Make up can make an ugly girl look beautiful but only money can make an ugly guy look handsome.” What are your thoughts on this quote?

You might be surprised; sometimes taking off the make up can make the girl look prettier. And sometimes, money will make the guy look even uglier. It is not what you have, but rather what you choose to do with what you have! If you like to use money to impress people, you need to ensure sustainability in that approach as once you reduce your spending the girl might take it that you are less interested in her. A more viable approach would be to impress with the right habits, traits and values.

 

Tips for online messaging

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Imagine this: after weeks of scrolling through endless online profiles and waiting on replies that never seem to arrive, you’re finally having a conversation with someone – and you feel like you might actually have a shot with this person!

But then one night you check your inbox for the umpteenth time and see no reply to your last message. What gives? Did your message get lost in the Internet’s black hole?

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Don’t panic just yet, because here are four quick tips to keep your instant messaging from turning into an instant disaster!

Timing is everything. Well, almost.

Before you give up on online dating, check the timestamp of your message. Messages sent during work hours or when your match is offline run the risk of getting buried among other messages delivered during this time.

The next step? Follow up on your message at a better time when it’s convenient for them to reply.. There’s no need to look to stars for answers: just consider your match’s schedule. If he/she works office hours, send out your message during lunch or after dinner time.

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Quick tip: take a peek at his/her online status. If both of you are online at the same time, it increases your chances of getting a reply if he/she is really interested in you.

More than words

Without being able to draw cues from body language or facial expressions, interpreting the tone of online messages can be a challenging affair. Mimicking the language of the other person can make your messages easier to understand, but for those who want a quick fix, emoticons are a good bet.

Attaching an emoticon to your message can help your match to read the tone of your message better while softening an otherwise curt-sounding text. As a bonus, they can also help you score more dates according to a TIME magazine research!

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Another great way to keep things from being drab is to share pictures of what you’re up to. It gives room to bring up new topics if he/she spots something interesting in your pictures. Saw a funny picture online? Why not share the laughter!

Fun fact: “emoticon” is a mash up of the words “emotion” and “icon”, best representing the value of these expressive pixel faces.

Ping! You’ve got a message!

Ever been intimidated by a wall of text? Keep things short and sweet so your match actually remembers what you said without having to reread your message – it’s called instant messaging for a reason!

Another pitfall is when too much slang or short forms are used. A string of alphabets may mean something to you, but to others it could involve time trying to figure out just what it means, and chances are nobody has time like that.

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Quick tip: loosen the tie when you’re messaging! You can be polite without being overly formal, which can mask your true, bubbly personality.

Keep the ball rolling

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of a dismissive “Hahah oic!” reply, you know how difficult it can be to continue the conversation. Keep things going by sharing something fun you did over the weekend or talk about an interesting piece of news you came across that morning.

For some inspiration, check back on his/her profile to see what their hobbies are, but don’t start an interrogation, now! Offer your opinions to build on the conversation or add in something about yourself. The ball is in your court once that reply comes in, so it’s up to you to return a hit!

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Quick tip: when you feel that both of you are ready to bring the conversation offline, initiate a meet up to get to know the other person better*. Invite him/her for a casual cup of coffee or a safe date on I-MeetYou.com!

Just keep these simple tips in mind and you’re ready to reply your inbox messages or start a conversation. Replies are good indicators of interest, but don’t be disheartened if your smiley face is left unanswered – you never know when your inbox will next ping with a reply from another interested match!

*Don’t disregard safety when you’re meeting someone online for the first time! Click here for some safety tips from I-MeetYou.com.

Love Express Event: Christian Connexion Lunch

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Events at Love Express cover a wide range of interests, including unique segmented events for singles with a specific criteria in mind. On 11 June, we had our Christian Connexion Lunch at Hotel Boss, with a private space set aside just for the event.

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A big year for love

Mega Party

This year, Love Express celebrates 9 years of helping singles connect. It is also the year of the official launch of two new sister companies, Divine Connect and I-MeetYou.com. The three companies are now under one collective, Love Et Al., headed by Love Express’s founder, Deon Chan.

The celebration, held on 1st May, saw Ms Chan talking about her journey with Love Express, and her goals for Love Et Al. in the lives of the local single community.

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Online Dating: Icebreaker Tips

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Imagine this scenario: you click on a promising online profile and read through his or her bio. In your head, the boxes check and you hover over the ‘Chat’ button in hopes to find out more about this dream person but then you freeze – what exactly do you say? Continue reading